What to Do When a Colleague Has an Alcohol or Drug Addiction Problem

"I think Ray, my partner, is in real trouble with his drinking, and I’m not sure what to do to help. I could smell alcohol on his breath this morning. Then after his 1:30 appointment, I saw him sneaking a drink from a bottle he had in his desk drawer.

"We’ve been friends and partners for years. I hate feeling like a snitch, but I think he may need some help. His job performance has slipped and he’s lost that sharp edge we all used to envy yet admire in him.

"I don’t know what he’ll say or do if I tell him my concern directly. But I do know that we can’t afford to let things continue as they are. Both Ray and our practice deserve better than that."

The need to intervene seems readily apparent in this scenario. Not taking any action is the worst thing you can do. But how do you begin? What can you do to improve this difficult situation rather than making it worse?

The first step is to have a private, one-on-one meeting with Ray, preferably not in the office. By meeting in private, eye to eye, you can tell your colleague your concerns and still express your support and understanding. Your friendship may make it easier for Ray to come clean with you about how serious his drinking problem has become.

You might say something like, "I thought I smelled booze on your breath when you came into the office this morning. Would you like to talk about it?" Be as empathic, as understanding, as possible and avoid using an accusatory tone. You want him to be able to hear your concern, not your judgment.

If you are fortunate, Ray will open up and say, "You’re right. I do have a problem."

But don’t be shocked if Ray denies having any problem with alcohol—or with drugs, either, since these addictions often go hand in hand. Denial is the first response of most people faced with addiction.

And don’t be surprised if your colleague acts shocked or becomes angry with you. His reaction hides a multitude of other feelings, from embarrassment and guilt, to powerlessness, sorrow and shame.

In many situations like this, the person’s denial forces you into taking the next step. You may need to gather other colleagues, as well as Ray’s friends and family members, for a well-planned meeting. These intervention meetings allow everyone in the group to calmly and systematically share with Ray their concerns about his drinking or drug-taking behavior, and how it is affecting each of you in ways he cannot see. For a successful intervention, it’s best to get professional advice. Call your local drug treatment program or mental health center and ask for an intervention specialist.

This step basically takes the form of a surprise group meeting with Ray. One approach that often produces good results is to invite the person over for a home-cooked meal. Then the rest of the concerned group of friends, family and co-workers arrives after the meal to talk. Each guest takes a minute or two to tell Ray why he or she is worried about his out-of-control drinking or other addictive behavior.

The most helpful aspect of this sort of group intervention usually proves to be the genuine expressions of kindness, gentleness and concern for the addicted individual. The cumulative effect of such comments can be very powerful.

In some cases, though, your colleague will continue to deny needing help and will refuse any suggestion to enter treatment. When that occurs, it may be necessary to outline some specific consequences of continued alcohol or drug use in the workplace and to make it clear that these will be enforced. Ray may respond initially with a brief period of compliance, but the nature of addiction could cause him to relapse into more addictive behavior.

Family members, friends and co-workers can find support by attending a local Al-Anon meeting. Al-Anon groups offer assistance to people close to someone with an addiction. Phone numbers and information about meeting times can usually be found in your local white or yellow pages.

If Ray can acknowledge his addiction and wants treatment, what then? The firm can seek a referral for treatment in a setting where he will not feel stigmatized or out of place. The employee assistance programs available through state bar associations are especially helpful in recommending a treatment program for professionals.

Many attorneys and other business people prefer to seek treatment outside their home community, but that’s not always necessary because treatment programs offer assistance in confidence. Treatment programs vary greatly according to the needs of the particular individual. Several days may be essential for detoxification or withdrawal, depending on the amount of alcohol or type of drug being used and the length of time the abuse has gone on. Some programs recommend an inpatient stay of a few weeks; others focus on providing outpatient or day care.

Comprehensive addiction treatment may focus on denial, relapse prevention, behavioral skills and group or individual work. Some treatment centers cater especially to professionals dealing with addiction or facing a variety of other problems. They offer a treatment setting where job stresses are understood and where the struggles of maintaining sobriety in a fast-paced job environment are discussed and prepared for.

For many professionals, needing to ask for help—and then learning how to use
it—can be a major barrier to successful addiction treatment. Being in an environment where other professionals are also practicing these skills can provide support and encouragement.

Addiction treatment requires patience and persistence. Not everyone is ready for treatment even when the consequences of continuing addiction become unpleasant. But maintaining consistent limits and encouraging the addicted person to seek help may be the keys to a friend or colleague’s success in overcoming addiction and resuming productivity.

Copyright © 2000 The Menninger Foundation.